Things that I look for before being in a relationship

Ok, tonite tetiba sampai ler seru utk iolss berciter pasal what I look for in a guy.....

Firstly, dont get me wrong...I can talk and mix with almost all type of people tapi there are certain qualities that I look for in a guy (before I wanna be in a relationship).

Yang pertama-tamanya....saya nie sebenar nye (saya rasa lah kan) seorang yg terlalu matang for my age.  I have few friends that are of the same age with me tetapi saya berani mengatakan mereka pun tak sematang saya.  Please, faham nie yek....matang tak bererti old school or kolot...Matang dari segi cara berfikir, cara membuat keputusan dan the way I look at live.  Based on my experience lah kan, I find it difficult to be in a relationship with a guy in my age group.....kalau mereka tua dari saya setahun dua pun, saya rasa, at the end of the day, I have to distance myself from them sebab saya rasa, saya yg akan byk bimbing mereka nanti....It should be the other way round.  Saya perlu kan bimbingan, bukannya membimbing lelaki...

Bercakap pasal cara berfikir, kadang2 cara saya berfikir tu memang out of the box and most of the time, tak "sajak".....Few times saya perasan perkara ni especially apabila ditegur oleh teman2 rapat saya.  Jadinya, any other ordinary guy around my age group would feel that I'm a threat to them.....coz they should be doing the thinking and not me.   They should take the lead.

And of course, the chemistry must be there.  This is something that we cant force, it comes naturally.  That's why kepada bakal teman rapat saya, be rest assured that insya allah hati saya tak berubah walaupun pada zahirnya saya kelihatan punya ramai kawan lelaki berbanding perempuan.  I have this system whereby kalau saya sudah anggap lelaki itu sebagai kawan saya dari hari pertama saya kenal dia, perkara itu akan register dlm otak saya sampai bila2.  And isteri2 kawan lelaki saya pun kenal dan mesra dgn saya coz mereka tahu saya tidak ada perasaan terhadap suami mereka.....Kalau tak percaya, sila lah interview kawan2 lelaki saya yg mana isteri mereka memang kenal saya.....

And satu lagi, I seek comfort in older guys....why?? Because they are wiser and have more experience than me.  And based on my experience dealing with older guys, I know that we have the same wave length (in terms of thinking) and I could relate to them better... Seriously, saya tak pernah berasa mereka ini lebih berusia kerana we could talk the same lingo and the way we look at live/issues is almost the same.  And I notice that these people are more comfortable liaising/dealing with me compared to my other counterparts...

So what is the conclusion here?  

Saya perlukan seseorang yg lebih berusia/matang daripada saya...yang boleh bimbing saya, yg boleh "control" saya kerana saya tahu, at times, I'm uncontrollable.....and I know guys around my age tak bisa nak control saya....Ada sekali tu, someone that I knew for quite some time pernah berkata "masa lagu nie keluar kat radio, you were not even born yet".  That shows the age gap between both of us....to be more precise, 20 tahun....Dear, I never notice that the age gap between us is that far apart.....The thing is, I feel comfortable and safe with you....though at times bila kita bertemu, kita tak berkata2 apa2 tapi I feel comfortable being beside you, not having a conversation but deep down I am happy to be with you....for me, silence doesnt kill or harm me when we are together....