Not so wordless Wednesday

I slept at your side of the bed......crying myself to sleep, missing you more than before, disappointed with what had happened.....thinking how ignorant and selfish I was.  I was so engrossed with my office work that I didn't realise I hurt the feelings of the person that I really love and adore.  The person that I would never, ever want to hurt.

I fail to realise that you were really looking forward to see me, counting days after days for the date only to be hurt and ignored by me.  Sayang, I am indeed truly, deeply sorry.  If only I had one more chance to go back to that day, I would do everything I could to ensure that I will not repeat the same mistakes.  I still miss your smile, your laughter and the way you look deep into my eyes........Whenever you look deep into my eyes, I'm melted and I feel naked.....as if you could really see what's in my mind at the very moment.....and that's the very same reason as to why, whenever we meet, I would be quite timid and quiet......(bahasa Indon nya dibilang bungkam.....ehh, tetiba pulak ada yg enterframe.....hehehehe) ....

You might wonder why I could freely express my feelings in blog and not face to face......until now, I still feel shy with you......malu untuk menzahirkan segala perasaan yang ada di dalam hati, malu untuk berdepan dengan orang yang teramat istimewa dalam hidup ku sekarang......so, please forgive me for that....

Sayang,  please forgive me......I'll try to improve myself........

A year older.....and a step closer to the next world

So, I'm a year older today......How do I feel?  I feel great.....I feel blessed that I'm given a chance to still be around to celebrate my born day.

Started early today....pagi2 dah masuk dapur, rendam pulut and did all the preparation before full blast cooking.  Since rumah hari nie penuh dgn bebudak yg hantu pulut, I took the chance to cook extra......(all the while pun bila masak mcm 15 org punya makan, itu kata mak aku ler).

By 12:00 noon, semua dah complete and aku pun dah 2 round balun pulut dgn kari ayam.  Mula2 ingat nak masak rendang ayam tapi baru aje last week buat rendang, so, terus ler tukar plan.

Then, spent the afternoon with My Sayang.  Maaf Sayang, tetiba lak seblm keluar tadi, dpt call dari opis, kena settlekan something extremely urgent.  Maaf kerana I concentrate too much to get the task done.  I hope perkara nie takkan berulang lagi....next time round, memang ler I will off my hp bila bercuti, especially when I'm with you.

Moga dimurahkan rezeki, dikurniakan kesihatan yg baik dan dipermudahkan segala usaha dlm mencari rezeki yang halalan toyyiba......

Dan kejelitaan adalah hak milik setiap insan......

This is really irritating.  Aku dah siap prepare awal2 lagi posting belog, kalih2, lenyap mcm tu aje.......eeeerrrrkkk.....tensi, tensi!

Baru2 nie, aku attend MAESA AGM, sesaje because nk jumpa geng2 kat situ.  I bumped into few of my cronies masa kat sana.  One thing they have in common ialah they commented that my face looked different now as compared to the last time they saw me at HQ.  Siap tanya lagi apakah rahsia nye?  Jawapan standard retis aku ialah ianya berkat wuduk yg sempurna......depa terus muntah darah mendengar....hehehe.

Masa dlm hall tu, aku duduk sebelah ex officemate.....Dia noticed that my skin sekarang tak kusam mcm dulu.....siap dia kata nampak glowing.....So, aku pn share ler my little secret.......

For the past 2 weeks, I've been taking Soy Collagen Nurbeautyline every day before breakfast.  Although at first I was a bit skeptical, tapi lepas 2 hari mencuba, terasa kulit tangan very the soft, supple and mcm gebu gittew..... Pasal tu aku terus continue mengambil nye.....

Soy Collagen Nurbeautyline....sedapss, rasa air soya....

At the same time, aku juga telah switch skincare aku.  I'm currently using bio essence (with pine pollen) product range utk kulit muka aku nie.  Aku mengamalkan penggunaan cleansernya, together wit the toner and re-sculpturing cream.  The toner is really nice, mula2 terasa cam berminyak rupanya.....tapi selepas a good few minutes, the toner essence tu really being absorbed into your skin....and the end result, terasa kulit lembut seperti kulit baby tau.......

 

Bio Essence with Pine Pollen.....nyaman pada kulit...

Semua testimonial nie adalah pendapat peribadi aku, berdasarkan pengalaman aku sebagai pengguna produk2 tersebut.  Sorry, aku tak dibayar oleh mana2 produk tersebut, sekadar berkongsi kegumbiraan melihat perubahan pada diri senirik......

Ulangtahun Pertama

Yes, today marks my first anniversary.  On this very same day last year, I've made a very drastic move to change.  As mentioned in my previous posting, until now I do not have the answer.

If you ask me how I feel, I would say that I personally feel the changes in me.  I'm more calm and relax.  I also feel safe because I finally understand why Allah made it compulsory for women to wear hijab.

No doubt memang ada dugaan dlm kita melakukan perubahan ke arah yang baik tetapi Alhamdulillah, aku masih boleh berfikir secara waras.

Doa ku agar Allah berikan aku kekuatan serta menetapkan hati ku agar terus berada di jalan yang betul dan terus istiqamah dalam melalui kehidupan seharian.

My extended family reunion

Semalam, kami telah pergi menghadiri acara pernikahan so called "anak angkat" family kitaorg.  Kisahnye, mereka bertiga ditinggalkan bersama kami (dari aku form 4 sampai umor aku lebey kurang 20 tahun) because their mother further study overseas.  First 2 years, mereka bertiga dan by the time the mother balik bercuti in her 3rd year, dia bawak yg bongsu ikut dia ke U.S.

Panjang cerita sebenarnye dengan mereka nie.  Kisah mereka sedih.  Masa mereka ditinggalkan dgn kitaorg, mereka berumur 6, 5, dan 4 tahun.  Such a tender age dan dah berpisah dengan ibu mereka.

I used to remember yg the first one tu, namanya Afiq...a very serious kid.  Yg second one tu, namanye Atif, very joyful and flirty (kecik2 dh pandai jual minyak wokeh....) and the third one tu, dlm dunianye sendiri, bernama Azim.

Lepas ibu mereka pulang dari overseas, diaorg ikut ibu mereka semula dan kami terputus hubungan.  Last 2 years, I think, my bruder terserempak dgn mereka kat airport and tersambung ler balik hubungan kami.

I could remember vaguely yang aku pernah angkut mereka bertiga, plus another 3 more kids pergi bermandi manda di Wet World Shah Alam.  Aku sorang adult wokeh, jaga 6 org budak2 tadika.....we did enjoy our trip.....pergi balik naik bas.....it was fun.

Ok, so semalam, si abang a.k.a. Afiq telah bernikah dengan gadis pilihannye.  Afiq is a law graduate from UiTM, sekarang buat business sendiri yg dikongsi bersama adiknya, si Atif.  Supplier of frozen food (what a coincidence) yg baru nak bertapak.  Seblm nie, mereka join venture dgn pak sedara mereka buat construction business kat kg mereka, Kelantan.

Maka, terjadi ler jejak kasih bila mak aku bertemu dgn ibu mereka.  Ada ler sikit adegan airmata......but overall, we did have a good time.  To Afiq and couple, selamat pengantin baru, selamat menempuh alam baru dan moga berkekalan hingga ke akhir nafas.  Banyakkan bersabar dalam menempuh alam rumah tangga....berbanyaklah berdoa kepada Nya moga perjalanan hidup berkeluarga dipermudahkan......

Ok, kita camwhore dulu seblm pg function....heheh

The pelamin akad nikah.....simple tapi cantik....

Barangan hantaran kedua2 belah pihak....

Me, my mum and my peberet adik, Atif.

My mum bersama anak2 angkat dia....From left:  Atif, the pengantin, Afiq and on the right, Azim..

The newly wed - Afiq and Bella

Speechless

I was stunned and speechless for a moment just now.  You do remember the date (tarikh ok).  All the while I thought u dont.  Terharu tetiba (motif??), over lar sangat kan.

Now, everything starts to flashback in my mind.  Hmm......it's been so long that we know each other..........and I admit that I am comfortable, really comfortable with you.  I can be myself whenever I'm with you.  You've been there all the while......through my good and bad times.....and thank you dear, I really appreciate it.

If I had one wish, I would wish that I could keep you near me for as long as I'm alive.  You've been a good companion, a good listener....someone I could share my stories with, be it good or bad.  Thank you for being a good listener......and motivator too.  You are always the first person I would want to share my story with.......

All in all, whenever I look at you, it's like I'm looking into a mirror whereby I could see myself, crystal clear.

Thank you for being there for me all the while. ....I wish I could keep you forever.....I wish that this feeling lasts forever......



A Day before the General Election Day

Sehari sebelum G.E, one of my cousins buat kerja kawen.  Memandangkan build-up area rumah dia tu agak terhad, so, we decided to look for homestay not far dari venue kerja kawen dia.  We ended up at Block 36, Seksyen 24 Shah Alam.  I found this homestay kat website Mudah.com.my.  Berbaloi, rumah baru buat renovation, facilities masih baru and most important thing is comfortable.

We (my parents, my nephew and aunties) spent a nite kat situ.  Memang ler convenient sebab senang nak cari makan bila lapar time malam.  All of us had a good time and my parents truly enjoy their stay here.

Oh ya, kerja kawen tu berjalan dengan lancar.  Selamat Pengantin Baru, Moga berbekekalan ke akhir hayat diucapkan kepada sepupu ku dan pasangannya.  Ingat, alam perkahwinan ni ada pasang surut nya....maka, banyak2 kan bersabar, bertolak ansur, saling faham memahami antara satu sama lain and most importantly, banyakkan berdoa kepada Allah agar dipermudahkan perjalanan hidup berkeluarga.....insya allah.....

AF Homestay, contact no. semua ada kat situ....

Ruang dapur yang lapang dan selesa

Bilik no. 3

Bilik no. 2

Master bedroom yang lapang dan selesa

Berinai biru di pagi hari

Disebabkan Selangor dah di"declare" cuti umum pada hari Isnin, maka, hari nie aku dengan penuh bersemangat ingin menunaikan tanggungjawab aku.  Seawal pagi dah keluar ke pusat mengundi.  Pusat mengundi tu merupakan sekolah aku zaman dulu, Sekolah Rendah Kebangsaan Seksyen 17, Shah Alam. 

Sampai aje kat sana, hambek ko, dah ramai dah manusia yg tiba.  Mula2 cek senarai daftar pemilih, amek slip dan pg ke tempat mengundi.  All in, the whole process amek masa lebih kurang 45 menet hokey, that shows betapa ramainye manusia yg keluar mengundi di pagi hari.

Ok, pass!  Memang warganegara Malaysia......

Menunggu giliran utk memangkah.  Yg berbaju hijau gelap tu, kawan masa sekolah rendah.  Kat sini bertemu semula.

Berinai biru di pagi hari konsepnye.....hehehehe